Everyone needs a break, if it be from work, school, friends, even husbands and wives need breaks from one another. I don’t mean a break like Ross and Rachel from friends, I mean like a coffee break!
A break that gives a breather, a little space to help slow things down, feel your present self, catch your feelings, remind you what’s important and whats petty, prioritise your thoughts.
I took a break back in October. I was in emotional overload, stressed to the max, I felt if I didn’t go away my health and sanity were going to deteriorate rapidly. I hadn’t been away from my kids and partner in years unless it was unavoidable circumstances.
My partner on the other hand has NEVER taken a break in the 24 years that we’ve been together. As time has gone he has never done anything without me, no hobbies, no adventures nothing, unless I arranged them. Since last year I have been encouraging him to get a hobby and he’s flakily been going to the gym.
Since I went away last year and was video calling him from under a palm tree, beside the sea and blue sunny skies, he has said that he will also be going away in February. I couldn’t believe my ears, that means I get a SECOND break haha. He booked it so last minute I began to panic that he wont be going at all. Don’t get me wrong it’s not that I want him gone, I’m aware of how this break will give US the break we need, while he has gone I will also fall into a relaxed state because the routine will change from the mundane repetitive routine, my life for a moment will slow down, I will enjoy the break. Though my brain will fall into holiday mode, I will eventually begin to feel his absence and begin to miss him. This sweetness is the fruit of desire, I will be more patient of his ways, the absence will highlight the things I miss which are also things that drive me mad.
He was so excited to be going he could barely sleep, I’m happy for him and excited at the same time, I already cant’ wait to hear about his time away. I also have plans while he is away, which I can not say incase he decides to read my blog while his away (i’ll keep you posted), and I can not wait to share them with him when he returns.
Taking a break, doesn’t have to be extreme
Eating or going out with a friend
A hobby with a friend
Going away for a few days
Don’t let trust issues get in the way
In many cases I hear that one of the partners may get jealous or not trust their partner to go away without them. Unless there has been good reason to not be trusted why would there be a trust issue? Likewise, if there has been a reason how do you intend to move forward and make the relationship stronger? If trust or jealousy is an issue, I would suggest seeking some couples support/counselling, endeavour to work on your relationship for the long haul.